As an unexpected fruit of the Synod, I have been appointed Pope.  As my first act, I have sought to reconcile Traditionalists and gay marriage advocates by instituting the Darling Papal Tiara.  So far, all the focus group results seem positive.  Also, my liturgical dance moves have been termed “groovalicious” by both The Remnant *and* the National Catholic Reporter.  So that little dustup appears to be over.  Now, accompanied by my own personal beat boxer (former Vice President Dick Cheney, behind me in this photo), I will be starting my N-FALLIB-L tour next month, laying down some serious fresh orthodoxy.  Shout outs to all my peeps!