Where are all the Gentlemen?

On The Catholic Man Show episode 16, Adam and Dave break down being a gentleman from head to toe.

Adam Minihan and David Niles would sit together on a back porch in Tulsa, OK with a nice scotch and possibly a smoke, discussing the lack and perversion of manhood and fatherhood in today’s society. These habitual conversations eventually led to the creation of The Catholic Man Show. Each week Adam and David get together on The Catholic Man Show to do 3 things. Number 1: Highlight a man beverage. Number 2: Showcase a man gear. And number 3: Talk about a manly topic.  Our goal is to help men take their vocation more seriously, fall deeper in love with our Lord, and restore true masculinity in the modern world.

Being a Gentleman: From Head to Toe

Here are some of the bare essentials of being a gentleman that Adam and David highlighted.

The Head

Gentleman,

Most have moved away from formal hats and have gravitated to ball caps. Regardless of the type of hat, a gentleman should remember when to remove it:

• When indoors except in a places which are similar to public streets: lobbies, corridors, department stores, or office buildings.
• Men should remove their hats in times of prayer.  When in church, at a funeral, wedding, baptism, dedication, or any religious event.
• Eating dinner. Men should never wear hats when at the dinner table

The Ears, Eyes and Mouth

Gentlemen,

Ears:

• We have 2 ears and 1 mouth. We are made to listen more than we speak. When your wife speaks to you, listen to her. Give her your full attention. This shows you care about what she is saying.
• Be careful what music you listen to. Most modern music is full of filth. Listening to music full of profanity does not set a good example to those around you nor glorifies the kingdom of God. Also, as a pure act of modesty, listen to your music at moderate volumes — your neighbors will thank you.

Mouth:

• The vows you take in the sacrament of marriage, you say, “For better and for worse, in sickness and in health”. We are called to build up our spouse regardless of our current situation. When you are with a group of friends, never belittle or speak ill of your spouse. You are trying to get each other to heaven, tearing each other down is counter-productive. Embrace and love the faults of your spouse, they will sanctify you.
• Avoid cursing. Many forget the 2nd commandment: “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.”

Eyes:

• Look people in the eyes when introducing yourself and when having a conversation.
• As men it is virtuous to keep custody of the eyes. If you can’t offer up what you are looking at to our Lord, it is probably best to be looking elsewhere.

The Shoulders

Gentlemen,

It is important to dress appropriately for each occasion. You don’t wear a suit and tie to go mow the yard. Similarly, you don’t wear a t-shirt and cutoff jean shorts to a wedding. When you take your family to church, it is important to bring the best presentation of yourself to church. This sets an example to your children that going to church is an important thing the family does and is different than other activities throughout the week.

The Hands

Gentlemen,

• Firmly shake hands for all introductions and all goodbyes to men — but don’t ever offer your hand to a woman unless she extends hers first. When she holds out her hand, you’re supposed to do the shaking: two or three short up and down movements is adequate.  Remember women could have rings on their fingers so don’t squeeze too tight.
• Hold open doors, car doors, and help women down the stairs even if it is inconvenient.

The Knees

Gentlemen,

As John Wayne said in the movie, McLintock, “You must be a man before you can be a gentleman”.  To be a man means to sacrifice for your family. The man of the house is both a spiritual and physical protector of the family. It is an injustice to your family if you don’t get down on his knees and pray for them everyday. You lead by example in all aspects of life… this includes your prayer life.

The Feet

Gentlemen,

• Hop to them whenever a woman enters a room where you are sitting, and stand on them until she sits or goes. An old school gentleman never sits unless and until all women in the room are also sitting; and then, unless he is in his own house, he sits only on invitation.
• Stand up for men, too, for introductions, greetings, leave-takings. This “comes natural”; it’s not comfortable to shake hands from a sitting position, so you stand whenever a handshake is imminent.
• Stand up when someone, man or woman, is trying to pass in front of you in a row of theatre seats or in a church pew. Only a very small child can squeeze between your knees and the next row of seats, no matter how tight you think you’ve drawn yourself up.

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